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The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes (1970)
The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes. Anything But Elementary.
Filmmaker(s): Billy Wilder

Holmes and Dr. Watson take on the case of a beautiful woman whose husband has vanished. The investigation proves strange indeed, involving six missing midgets, villainous monks, a Scottish castle, the Loch Ness monster, and covert naval experiments.

Tamer Wilder like the fantasy of a superartist, someone who knows what they are doing, someone who knows where the levers to my soul are. But I know that's extremely rare, that most art that I see as art is the result of someone just following...


Published December 12, 2022
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Joan of Arc (1948)
Greatest of all spectacles!
Filmmaker(s): Victor Fleming

In the 15th Century, France is a defeated and ruined nation after the One Hundred Years War against England. The fourteen-year-old farm girl Joan of Arc claims to hear voices from Heaven asking her to lead God's Army against Orleans and crowning the weak Dauphin Charles VII as King of France. Joan gathers the people with her faith, forms an army, and conquers Orleans.

Burned Alive wonder if there is anyone who can view this film with any sort of fondness today. Everything about it is false, with no element one can point to for relief. Yes it has Ingrid, but as wooden as a pike. Yes it has a...


Published December 1, 2022
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Alexander (2004)
The greatest legend of all was real
Filmmaker(s): Oliver Stone

Alexander, the King of Macedonia, leads his legions against the giant Persian Empire. After defeating the Persians, he leads his army across the then known world, venturing farther than any westerner had ever gone, all the way to India.

The Borrowed and Darius knitted together the largest empire known before or since. Their method was innovative, to allow local control preserving the culture and gods. What they added was infrastructure: roads, a universal set of laws (the first case law) weights and monetary system. The...


Published November 30, 2022
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The Birth of a Nation (1915)
The Fiery Cross of the Ku Klux Klan!
Filmmaker(s): D.W. Griffith

Two families, abolitionist Northerners the Stonemans and Southern landowners the Camerons, intertwine. When Confederate colonel Ben Cameron is captured in battle, nurse Elsie Stoneman petitions for his pardon. In Reconstruction-era South Carolina, Cameron founds the Ku Klux Klan, battling Elsie's congressman father and his African-American protégé, Silas Lynch.

Bad Influence film marked a disastrous turn in American society. No, I’m not talking about the overtly racist content. Any nitwit can see that and adjust, though I suspect that my grandchildren will decry with equal vehemence the content of the films I now casually...


Published September 11, 2023
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Jamaica Inn (1939)
Charles Laughton's eyebrows have a lifestyle to maintain and don't care how many sailors die to maintain it.
Filmmaker(s): Alfred Hitchcock

In coastal Cornwall, England, during the early 19th Century, a young woman who's come there to visit her aunt, discovers that she's married an inkeeper who's a member of a gang of criminals who arrange shipwrecking and murder for profit.

Piracy eventually made some transcendent films. But that would be way later than this period, where he did his work as instructed and on time. His contribution to cinema was the invention of the camera whose awareness deviated from the narrative bound in the actors. In...


Published November 24, 2022
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Kama Sutra: A Tale of Love (1996)
Filmmaker(s): Mira Nair

Tara and Maya are two inseparable friends in India. Their tastes, habits, and hobbies are the same. Years later, the two have matured, but have maintained their friendship. Tara gets married to the local prince, Raj Singh, who soon succeeds the throne as the sole heir. After the marriage, Raj gets bored of Tara and starts seeking another female to satisfy his sexual needs. He notices Maya and is instantly attracted to her. He has her included as one of his courtesans, and is intimate with her. Watch what happens when Tara finds out and the extent she will go to keep her marriage intact.

Club Exotica of the several foibles of the United States is that we have no indigenous sexual exotica. All sexual archetypes are inherited from predecessor cultures (excepting the competing African-American cultures), which is one reason -- I believe -- that US popular culture is so...


Published November 24, 2022
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Elvira Madigan (1967)
Filmmaker(s): Bo Widerberg

Hedvig Jensen is a famous ropewalker and is known to her public as Elvira Madigan. She meets Lieutenant Sixten Sparre, a Swedish officer who is married and has two children. They both decide to run away, but since Sixten deserted the army, he cannot find any job and the couple encounters many hardships. Moreover, while on the run, Sixten meets a friend who tries to convince him to come back to his country and family.

Love is When You Borrow Someone Else's Eyes of the simple pleasures of life is to sit in a darkened theatre and have a film capture your soul, not as a single person, but as the whole sigh of the room. I saw this in...


Published October 31, 2022
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Hero (2002)
One man's strength will unite an empire.
Filmmaker(s): Zhang Yimou

During China's Warring States period, a district prefect arrives at the palace of Qin Shi Huang, claiming to have killed the three assassins who had made an attempt on the king's life three years ago.

Space things interesting about this project. First, the sad news, at least for the Chinese, that the Japanese have finally won. This is a Japanese film in all important respects: the theming by lush colour, the rather modern notion of benevolent conquest (genuinely originating in...


Published October 23, 2022
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Siberiade (1979)
The history of Russia from the beginning of the century till early 80s.
Filmmaker(s): Andrei Konchalovsky

The story about a very small god-forgotten village in Siberia reflects the history of Russia from the beginning of the century till the early 1980s. Three generations try to find the land of happiness and to give it to the people. One builds the road through taiga to the star over horizon, the second 'build communism' and the third searches for oil.

2001: Blondsongs, Gasroads and Fogsex this is compared to "Doctor Zhivago," I suppose because there are Russian revolutionaries. Egad. The films couldn't be more different. This is inspired by "2001." Equally inexplicably, "Solaris" is called the Russian 2001 because. Heck, because it has space hardware. Jees. The...


Published September 19, 2022
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JFK (1991)
The story that won't go away.
Filmmaker(s): Oliver Stone

Follows the investigation into the assassination of President John F. Kennedy led by New Orleans district attorney Jim Garrison.

Conspiracy of the Simple have my own theory about film. There is always an explicit acknowledgement that what you are seeing is a film, distinct from reality. Many films incorporate that recognition into their being; the simple ones are just films about films and filmmaking,...


Published May 13, 2022
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