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X2: X-Men United (2003)
The time has come for those who are different to stand united.
Filmmaker(s): Bryan Singer

Professor Charles Xavier and his team of genetically gifted superheroes face a rising tide of anti-mutant sentiment led by Col. William Stryker. Storm, Wolverine and Jean Grey must join their usual nemeses—Magneto and Mystique—to unhinge Stryker's scheme to exterminate all mutants.

Utterly Pedestrian I have enthusiastic hopes for big budget action pictures. That's because the market is so crowded, and the viewing public so visually sophisticated that we know that some thought must go into these things. This is especially so when you are building a franchise,...


Published October 8, 2024
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Bubba Ho-Tep (2002)
The King vs. The King of the Dead.
Filmmaker(s): Don Coscarelli

Bubba Ho-tep tells the "true" story of what really did become of Elvis Presley. We find Elvis as an elderly resident in an East Texas rest home, who switched identities with an Elvis impersonator years before his "death," then missed his chance to switch back. He must team up with JFK and fight an ancient Egyptian mummy for the souls of their fellow residents.

The Singing Detective For those who don't know it, 'The Singing Detective' was the only decent thing I know that TeeVee has produced. It was one of those longish movies they call a miniseries. It featured a man in a hospital who imagined himself to be...


Published September 28, 2024
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The Day After Tomorrow (2004)
Where will you be?
Filmmaker(s): Roland Emmerich

After years of increases in the greenhouse effect, havoc is wreaked globally in the form of catastrophic hurricanes, tornadoes, tidal waves, floods and the beginning of a new Ice Age. Paleoclimatologist Jack Hall tries to warn the world while also shepherding to safety his son, trapped in New York after the city is overwhelmed by the start of the new big freeze.

Burned Books Why oh why do makers of bad films sometimes put a really good actor in a minor part? It just makes everything else seem cheap. In this case, Ian Holm has a few small scenes that anchor the film. He plays the part that...


Published September 22, 2024
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Titanic (1997)
Nothing on Earth could come between them.
Filmmaker(s): James Cameron

101-year-old Rose DeWitt Bukater tells the story of her life aboard the Titanic, 84 years later. A young Rose boards the ship with her mother and fiancé. Meanwhile, Jack Dawson and Fabrizio De Rossi win third-class tickets aboard the ship. Rose tells the whole story from Titanic's departure through to its death—on its first and last voyage—on April 15, 1912.

The Huge Machine I admit to a certain admiration of Cameron. Alone among special effects manipulators, he has a solid sense of what works cinematically. When he invests, he invests in a world. That world envelops us with its completeness and magnitude. It is the opposite...


Published September 22, 2024
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2012 (2009)
We Were Warned.
Filmmaker(s): Roland Emmerich

Dr. Adrian Helmsley, part of a worldwide geophysical team investigating the effect on the earth of radiation from unprecedented solar storms, learns that the earth's core is heating up. He warns U.S. President Thomas Wilson that the crust of the earth is becoming unstable and that without proper preparations for saving a fraction of the world's population, the entire race is doomed. Meanwhile, writer Jackson Curtis stumbles on the same information. While the world's leaders race to build "arks" to escape the impending cataclysm, Curtis struggles to find a way to save his family. Meanwhile, volcanic eruptions and earthquakes of unprecedented strength wreak havoc around the world.

Foreground - Background When you make a film that is nothing but flavoured special effects, when you make the matter of those effects into a character, you have two decisions to make. The first is whether you are dealing with object or environment. This is a fairly...


Published September 21, 2024
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The Chronicles of Riddick (2004)
All the power in the universe can't change destiny
Filmmaker(s): David Twohy

After years of outrunning ruthless bounty hunters, escaped convict Riddick suddenly finds himself caught between opposing forces in a fight for the future of the human race. Now, waging incredible battles on fantastic and deadly worlds, this lone, reluctant hero will emerge as humanity's champion - and the last hope for a universe on the edge of annihilation.

Three Women I go to opera now and then. Some people -- I suppose -- think that because much classical music is complex, so is opera. But there is a world of difference between a complex experience and a rich one. Opera is rich, and usually...


Published August 3, 2024
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Minority Report (2002)
Everybody runs.
Filmmaker(s): Steven Spielberg

John Anderton is a top 'Precrime' cop in the late-21st century, when technology can predict crimes before they're committed. But Anderton becomes the quarry when another investigator targets him for a murder charge.

The Ghost of Christie Spielberg continues in his reborn quest to be an intelligent filmmaker. Once again, he starts with an idea that is remarkably sophisticated. And once again his biggest enemy is himself as he lards on all the junk he is addicted to. First the...


Published July 28, 2024
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The Expendables (2010)
Choose your weapon.
Filmmaker(s): Sylvester Stallone

Barney Ross leads a band of highly skilled mercenaries including knife enthusiast Lee Christmas, a martial arts expert Yin Yang, heavy weapons specialist Hale Caesar, demolitionist Toll Road, and a loose-cannon sniper Gunner Jensen. When the group is commissioned by the mysterious Mr. Church to assassinate the dictator of a small South American island, Barney and Lee visit the remote locale to scout out their opposition and discover the true nature of the conflict engulfing the city.

Sliding Planes "Speedracer" and the "Transformer" movies, even the second "Charlie's Angels." These are silly or even bad films by the conventional measures. This is too. It is vapid, misogynistic and fundamentalist. I wouldn't recommend that anyone go unless they know themselves well enough. But like those other...


Published April 25, 2024
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Boxing Helena (1993)
Beyond love, beyond obsession, there hides something beyond reason.
Filmmaker(s): Jennifer Lynch

A top surgeon is besotted with a beautiful woman who once rebuffed him. Unable to come to terms with life without her, he tries to convince her that they need each other. She has other ideas, but a horrific accident leaves her at his mercy.

Children Oh what a problem adult children are. What do you do with children who become people? I’m thinking here are of children of friends who you admire and respect in some way, who are worth living and being with. Who enrich your life so you want...


Published April 20, 2024
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The Brain That Wouldn’t Die (1962)
Alive... without a body... fed by an unspeakable horror from hell!
Filmmaker(s): Joseph Green

Dr. Bill Cortner and his fiancée, Jan Compton, are driving to his lab when they get into a horrible car accident. Compton is decapitated. But Cortner is not fazed by this seemingly insurmountable hurdle. His expertise is in transplants, and he is excited to perform the first head transplant. Keeping Compton's head alive in his lab, Cortner plans the groundbreaking yet unorthodox surgery. First, however, he needs a body.

Brainy I’m a little annoyed at the folks that poke fun at this. Sure, all the production values are poor, but this is just a matter of degree. If perfected imagination is defined as the images you dream and you set that at 100, well maybe this...


Published April 20, 2024
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