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8 Women (2002)
Living in a house full of women can be murder.
Filmmaker(s): François Ozon

Eight women gather to celebrate Christmas in a snowbound cottage, only to find the family patriarch dead with a knife in his back. Trapped in the house, every woman becomes a suspect, each having her own motive and secret.

3 Women Really I had a lot of trouble with this film. I get what it is trying to do and particularly appreciate the notion. The distance between the story and the music is like that great bowling alley scene in “Buffalo 66” (and the similar...


Published November 22, 2022
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An Extremely Goofy Movie (2000)
Filmmaker(s): Douglas McCarthy

It's all extreme sports and a life of freedom as Max sets off for college -- but Goofy misses Max so much he loses his job and goes to finish college alongside Max and his friends. But as Goofy tries to get closer to Max, both must go to the extreme to learn how to live their own lives together.

Three Goofs There are three things about this little cartoon that should get you up-out-of-your-chair mad. And not just huffing mad, but pounding walls mad. The first is elusive. Walt Disney created Goofy and indeed all of his characters with a single notion: that they would be...


Published November 22, 2022
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Dude, Where’s My Car (2000)
After a night they can't remember, comes a day they'll never forget.
Filmmaker(s): Danny Leiner

Two stoners wake up after a night of partying and cannot remember where they parked their car.

Who’s On First Movies like this are made like chewing gum: a cheap commodity that occupies you if you’re normally sleepwalking. It is nothing but a collection of various jokes in one bag, so the best we can hope for is that one or two of...


Published November 22, 2022
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Pendulum (2001)
Murder, betrayal, lies. Time reveals all.
Filmmaker(s): James D. Deck

The nature and lure of power: in Dallas, a councilman is on trial for corruption, the D.A. is running for the US Senate, a serial killer is slashing prostitutes, and a professor is murdered. Amanda Reeve is assigned to investigate the law-school killing. She hears rumors that the dead man offered women students good grades in exchange for sex. The trail leads her to two wealthy, beautiful students whose alibi is provided by a librarian. At the same time, the cops close in on the slasher. Meanwhile, Amanda misses her former lover, next in line to become D.A., and a reporter is fired for getting close to the truth about the Senate candidate. Is a cover-up or conspiracy in the works?

Primal Instinct The first howler in this is the notion that Texas hosts the “finest law school in the south,” as if it were possible — and if would matter if it was. Of course, once we are introduced to a DA running for Congress, we...


Published November 22, 2022
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2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)
How fast do you like it?
Filmmaker(s): John Singleton

It's a major double-cross when former police officer Brian O'Conner teams up with his ex-con buddy Roman Pearce to transport a shipment of "dirty" money for shady Miami-based import-export dealer Carter Verone. But the guys are actually working with undercover agent Monica Fuentes to bring Verone down.

Too “American” I actually liked the original for the unexpected reason that it was intelligently stylish. Judging as a viewer, it must be amazingly difficult to be stylish and fresh because Hollywood (and the advertising industry) turns styles into mannerisms. The first film did something pretty...


Published November 22, 2022
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Harry Knuckles and the Pearl Necklace (2004)

Two spheres Why are Canada and Australia so invested in exploring the periphery? My own theory is based on the existence of a few talented teachers in key places. For whatever reason, this is something you are unlikely to find elsewhere. First, note that every production value...


Published November 20, 2022
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Happy Feet (2006)
WARNING: May Cause Toe-Tapping.
Filmmaker(s): George Miller

Into the world of the Emperor Penguins, who find their soul mates through song, a penguin is born who cannot sing. But he can tap dance something fierce!

Mad Maximum Motion You can parse this into three bits I think. The first is what people normally see, the story. Miller and many of the Oz New Wave don’t pay much attention to this. They put something there of course, otherwise we would get distracted. Here...


Published November 20, 2022
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Funky Forest: The First Contact (2005)

An outrageous collection of surreal, short attention span non-sequiturs largely revolving around Guitar Brother, his randy older sibling, and the pair's portly Caucasian brother.

Visits With a project like this, it is as likely that it is a random goof as something with some structure. It could be both. As this was sent to me by a fellow viewer, and because I am so inclined, I tend to see structure....


Published November 20, 2022
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Flash of Genius (2008)
Corporations have time, money, and power on their side. All Bob Kearns had was the truth.
Filmmaker(s): Marc Abraham

In this David vs. Goliath drama based on a true story, college professor Robert Kearns goes up against the giants of the auto industry when they fail to give him credit for inventing intermittent windshield wipers. Kearns doggedly pursues recognition for his invention, as well as the much-deserved financial rewards for the sake of his wife and six kids.

Wipeout There are all sorts of fabulous interminglings between film and life. At a general level, I study these things. But when “life” is meant in the sense of historical truth, and the film purports to represent that, then the examination gets a bits boring. Okay,...


Published November 20, 2022
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Glitch (2008)
Filmmaker(s): Randy Daudlin

A trio of brainboxes create a cell phone chip that allows telepathic communication. But when the experiment goes wrong and power falls into the wrong hands, the results are terrifying.

Canine Cells This is bad in all the ordinary ways. The idea is bad and the general setup. The science is bad. But many of the background characters are worthwhile. The usual pattern for these cartoony projects is to have the main characters operate in an environmental...


Published November 20, 2022
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