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House of Wax (2005)
Prey. Slay. Display.
Filmmaker(s): Jaume Collet-Serra

A group of unwitting teens are stranded near a strange wax museum and soon must fight to survive and keep from becoming the next exhibit.

Melted Me good movie may be like anything else: long periods of ordinariness with a few memorable bits. We tend to recall and savour only those memorable bits. For me, that was this movie. Yes, it was ordinary: hokey, stupid, bad acting and such. Yes, the...


Published November 27, 2022
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Hitman (2007)
Most believe his very existence is a sin. But others know he is a necessary evil.
Filmmaker(s): Xavier Gens

A genetically engineered assassin with deadly aim, known only as "Agent 47" eliminates strategic targets for a top-secret organization. But when he's double-crossed, the hunter becomes the prey as 47 finds himself in a life-or-death game of international intrigue.

Clones found this solid and competent. The curious thing is that what it did well, it did not because of what it is, but because it did not stick closely to the world of the video game. This is also why the fan base rejected...


Published November 26, 2022
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How to Make a Monster (2001)
What started out as a simple game... became a virtual nightmare.
Filmmaker(s): George Huang

Video game developer Clayton Software enlists the talents of a misfit group of programmers to develop the scariest computer combat game: EVILUTION. With four weeks to bring the game to market and a million-dollar bonus on the line, they utilize a telemetry suit to render a 3-D version of the onscreen player. But when a power surge gives the hard drive a mind of its own, the suit comes to life to play the game for real and the programming team find themselves in the middle of a chilling virtual nightmare beyond their wildest imagination.

Makes Itself have several movieland people I follow because what they do is pretty interesting. I have a (much larger) list of people that I follow casually because they show promise, or have done something interesting in the past. This little TeeVee movie popped up because...


Published November 26, 2022
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The Incredibles (2004)
Meet the Parrs, a family of superheroes.
Filmmaker(s): Brad Bird

Bob Parr has given up his superhero days to log in time as an insurance adjuster and raise his three children with his formerly heroic wife in suburbia. But when he receives a mysterious assignment, it's time to get back into costume.

Pixar is Invincible movies are about other movies. Most simply quote them, and most of these are bad. Some are very clever quoters, like Tarantino. But still mere quoters. A few weeks ago, I saw “Van Helsing” which impressed the daylights out of me. It...


Published November 26, 2022
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Cube Zero (2004)
Every nightmare has a beginning.
Filmmaker(s): Ernie Barbarash

A young programmer whose job is to watch over the reality-warping Cube defies orders to rescue an innocent mother trapped in one of its rooms.

Watchers was one of the enthusiasts of the original. It seemed a clever solution to one of filmdoms most persistent challenges: how to stage drama. Noir is our most basic cinematic model. The core of noir is a universe where capricious fate toys with human destiny...


Published November 26, 2022
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Be Cool (2005)
Everyone is looking for the next big hit.
Filmmaker(s): F. Gary Gray

Disenchanted with the movie industry, Chili Palmer tries the music industry, meeting and romancing a widow of a music executive along the way.

Acting Cool are born into the doom of being actors. If we are lucky we discover who we are but until then we go through a process of acting a role. Some movies play with this idea, and “Get Shorty” was one of the most...


Published November 26, 2022
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Auto Focus (2002)
A day without sex is a day wasted.
Filmmaker(s): Paul Schrader

A successful TV star during the 1960s, former "Hogan's Heroes" actor Bob Crane projects a wholesome family-man image, but this front masks his persona as a sex addict who records and photographs his many encounters with women, often with the help of his seedy friend, John Henry Carpenter. This biographical drama reveals how Crane's double life takes its toll on him and his family, and ultimately contributes to his death.

Soldiering, Winking, Filming Schrader simultaneously fascinates and repels me. That’s because he has such intelligent ideas for films, and then makes then in such a pedestrian fashion the inspiration is all but trod away. And his ideas are so very clever in addition to being intelligently...


Published November 26, 2022
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An Education (2009)
An education isn't always by the book.
Filmmaker(s): Lone Scherfig

Despite her sheltered upbringing, Jenny is a teen with a bright future; she's smart, pretty, and has aspirations of attending Oxford University. When David, a charming but much older suitor, motors into her life in a shiny automobile, Jenny gets a taste of adult life that she won't soon forget.

Wonderful Soul, Unwonderful World story happens all the time, I suppose. A young woman is bright, much brighter than her peers. She deeply understands the forces and passions in novels, real literature. That means that she is not only smart, that she understands life, but...


Published November 25, 2022
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Doctor Who The Unicorn and the Wasp (2008)

Minority Report reader suggested that I watch this. So I engaged with a few episodes, enough to find the most appealing ones to me. The supposed attraction is the extended magical journey, sort of a cross between “Doctor Strange,” the best Marvel comic character and “Hitchhiker’s...


Published November 25, 2022
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Ten Canoes (2009)
Ten canoes, three wives, one hundred and fifty spears...trouble

A story within a story within a story. In Australia's Northern Territory, an Aboriginal narrator tells a story about his ancestors on a goose hunt. A youngster on the hunt is being tempted to adultery with his elder brother's wife, so an elder tells him a story from the mythical past about how evil can slip in and cause havoc unless prevented by virtue according to customary tribal law.

Yolngu Goose-eggs all you need is magic. At least it seems so, when you see the real thing. If you happened to see Baz Luhmann's ‘Australia’ and was confused, see this instead. It is the genuine article, about the magic, told with magic. It is...


Published November 25, 2022
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